I Used to Have My Own Hymn Book

I used to have my own hymn book.

It was brand new, blue, with crisp pages and a new spine that still creaked a bit when you opened it. I thought it was perfect. It was a gift from my parents to encourage me to learn the hymns on the piano. And even though I often put up a fight when it came to practicing, it became one of the best-used gifts I ever received. I used it in Young Women’s, ward choirs, in playing at baptisms and firesides, and then I brought it to college with me. In my Freshman dorm, on Sunday mornings, I would often slip to an empty common area and play hymns before church. 

But I lost it. Since my sophomore year of college, I have been hymn-book-less. Instead, I'd use the Church's music app when my roommates would host hymn-sings or when I was working on my own music. There were times I'd miss having a paper copy, so I wouldn't have to squint at my tiny phone screen, but I made do.

However, a few months after getting married, I came home to find a big orange hymn book from the DI. Inside was a sweet note from Hayden.

“Here is for all of the people that we will gather together to sing praises to our God.

For all of the music-filled Sundays that I will get to share with you.

For guidance and inspiration for your own compositions and creations.

For all of those days when listening to hymns just doesn’t cut it.

For all of those days that we feel overwhelmed and need to bring a little more peace in our lives.

For all of the times where we want to invite the Spirit even more into our home.

For the service we will render through music.

For all of the days where I ask you to sing to me.

And all of the above. :)”

As I read this, I realized just how many sweet experiences Hayden and I have shared through music. He always attended my apartment’s hymn-sings. We’ve done ward and stake choirs together. Most recently, we joined the institute choir and sang for Elder Christofferson. We even sang my family’s “hymn,” “Bless This House” at our ring ceremony. Many quiet Sunday evenings, he has sat by me on the piano bench and sang children’s songs. 

Further, it made me reflect on the countless experiences I had growing up. I have bonded with elderly while playing the piano at retirement and nursing homes. As a child and in college, I had magical experiences singing in different churches. My family often sang around the piano on Sunday evening, at FHE... And I had the privilege of singing my heart out at the Fort Collins Temple Cultural Celebration.

I don’t think it’s an exaggeration to say that music has been formative in my life - especially for my testimony. I’ve got many family members, leaders, and teachers to thank for that. After all, music can invite the Spirit like nothing else. It has the potential to foster peace, teach doctrine, unite souls, lighten a heavy burden, and heal aching hearts with beauty and hope. I have felt those feelings countless times. 

But for some of us, music can sometimes seem like a chore. It can become a burden, a time-sucker, a frustration, or just a hum-drum part of life. And let me tell you — I get it! But amidst the hard work, rehearsals, tedious exercises, and the times when the basses can’t get their part ;), don’t forget the moments that make it worth it. The times you may feel an overwhelming sense of love or doctrinal clarity. The times you feel that magical unity with your family or group. Or the times when you see the Spirit working in the heart of a child or youth, like He did to mine growing up. I promise - it’s worth it. 

You don’t need a new hymn book to access the power of the hymns of Zion. From my experience, you don’t need a hymn book at all. And you definitely don’t need extensive training or a vast understanding of theory. No matter your background or calling, “the Lord loves effort.” He will bless and enrich lives as you use the gift of music to draw closer to Christ — and bring others with you. 

Here’s to the dull moments and the magical - and especially the moments that bring the Spirit and make it all feel worth it.